


Admittedly, It Was Jealousy

by DilynAliceBlake



Series: Jefferson/Hamilton [2]
Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: M/M, Soulmate AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-07-10
Updated: 2016-07-10
Packaged: 2018-07-22 20:03:21
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 7
Words: 2,925
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7452223
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/DilynAliceBlake/pseuds/DilynAliceBlake
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Thomas, that was a real nice declaration.</p><p>Thomas Jefferson had those words draped across his collarbone like a string of pearls, and he hated them.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

Thomas, that was a real nice declaration.

  
_Thomas,_ that was a real nice declaration.

  
Thomas, that was a  _real nice_  declaration.

  
Thomas Jefferson had those words draped across his collarbone like a string of pearls, and he hated them. 

Sure, they were nice enough words, but he heard variations _constantly_.  He very nearly wished he hadn't wrote the damnable thing, except there had been a crying need for it, and no one else could be trusted with anything so important.  So he woke up and got ready for another day at the office, buttoned up tight with enough frills spilling out of his shirt that the words felt safely tucked away beneath the fountain of layers, and dreading the fact that he'll probably have to hear them anyway.  Hardly a week goes by that SOMEONE doesn't compliment his work.

  
He pushes it out of his mind in time to notice that Hamilton is glaring at him again as he passes by on the way to his office.  His eyes are very... Intense.  Everything about Hamilton is intense.  The kid doesn't know how to calm down for a second, and it's hypnotic in the same way that watching a tightrope walker is.  Any second he could slip and go crashing down, and the suspense is commanding the room.  When Thomas stares back Hamilton flips him off and sneers, and Jefferson rolls his eyes at the level of childishness Alexander is capable of.  It's hard to believe that he's the reason Thomas has his position.  It irks a little, that he worked so hard for his place in the company, only to have veto power gifted to his enemy of all people.

  
Jefferson was a little amazed that Hamilton was professional enough to admit that he was the best choice for the job, but he supposes even Alexander Hamilton has to admit that Burr somewhere decisive decisions are necessary would be a disaster.

  
Thomas suspects that there might be some drama over the decision, now that it's final.  He signs into his computer a little before lunch to discover that, as usual, he was right.  He taunts an emoji out of the ever verbose Hamilton, and counts the day as a success.  When he goes to get his lunch and the window is covered he announces his presence before unlocking the door.  He scrutinizes the two of them, and tells himself that it's only to make sure nothing more untoward is happening in the office.  After the debacle with Maria, it's perfectly reasonable, no matter how straight Alexander apparently,  _disappointingly_ is.

  
Jefferson isn't jealous, and he certainly isn't _pining_.  Somewhere out there, there is someone perfect for him, and that means there's no point getting hung up on scrappy little troublemakers with handfuls of silky hair and deeply intense eyes.

  
He asks offhandedly about their chat and takes a bite of his food to get his mind off of it.

  
Except then Burr gives a toothy smile and walks out after announcing plain as you please that they've been talking about _kink negotiation_ of all things, and Thomas chokes while Alexander laughs.

  
"It's always the quiet ones," Hamilton says with a wink, and it's so much like flirting that Thomas can't even think of a proper retort, and sits alone in the room with his pasta until his meal is gone and his composure has returned.


	2. Chapter 2

He tries to get the down low on what's actually going on between Burr and Hamilton, but maybe his composure isn't as steady as he had thought, because for the first few messages he keeps capslock on.

  
Also apparently Hamilton is bi.  Which is... None of his business really.  Just like it's none of his business that Hamilton has a list of people at the office he'd like to fuck, and Burr of all people is on it.  Not that Jefferson is jealous.  He's not.  He's really not.  He's just concerned that all this personal chatter is keeping people from getting their work done, so he says so.  Hamilton is offended enough at that implication that Jefferson gets a whole string of emojiis, and the rough draft of Alexander's latest treatise. 

  
Lauren's starts going off via chat about some guy that Hamilton is apparently in love with, and Jefferson can't help but be grateful when Burr takes action for once in his life and blocks John before he can say who it is.  Thomas doesn't think he could deal with looking at someone in the office every day and thinking "Alexander is in love with him.  _Not me_."

  
He nearly kicks himself when he joins the back and forth out in the hallway and the first thing out of his mouth is a request for the name.

  
He doesn't need to know, and he doesn't have a crush on Hamilton, and all of them should really be working right now.  Denial is something that Thomas is adept at.

  
Burr and his wife have an agreement about who Burr is allowed to sleep with? Always the quiet ones indeed.

  
Does that mean Hamilton is on the list?  Does that mean Hamilton is going to sleep with Burr?  It's hard enough knowing that Maria and Eliza have both gotten to taste that brilliant tongue; Thomas doesn't think he could handle wondering who topped or how often those two have...

  
He shakes himself back to the present in time to watch the tightrope walker's fall.


	3. Chapter 3

"My _GOD_."  Angelica too?  That's _cold_ , even by Alexander's standards, and judging by how guilty he looks he knows it.

  
"Well, I think we can all call it a day," Jefferson says, because Alexander isn't meeting Eliza's eyes, and Angelica's lips are pressing together into nonexistence while she gives a resigned nod.  It's an admittance that Thomas could have gone without seeing.  He dismisses everyone from work, before someone else turns out to be someone he needs to be jealous of. 

  
Alexander opens his big mouth, hands reaching to undo his shirt, and Thomas panics.  He has enough trouble with fantasies without seeing any more of Alexander's skin.

  
Not the time or the place, indeed.

  
Hamilton says that he hasn't been completely honest, and Jefferson makes a biting comment as if Alexander is the only one who's been walking into work every day with a heart full of secrets.  As if he doesn't hide the necklace fate has inked into his skin, doesn't ignore the way he's fallen for Alexander's passion, betraying whoever is the match to those _damnable_ words.

  
Aaron starts undressing Alexander, and Thomas can't bear to watch any longer.  Then there are gasps from all around, and he can't help but to glance at what has everyone so shocked, and-

  
Hamilton has words scrawled across his hip, and Thomas' heart shatters.

  
Jefferson knew, he _knew_ that he would never have a chance with the hurricane of a man, but knowing and seeing are two completely different things.

  
Burr is staring at him like he can transmit thoughts just with his eyes, and Jefferson wants nothing more than to punch him for ruining whatever fantasy he had about a possibility of happiness with the poison tongued Nevisian.

  
What is he trying to imply with that look?  Does he think he's so high and mighty because he knew and none of the others did?  Well, now everyone's seen, and they all know, so they're on even ground!

  
Burr's eyebrow twitches upward, and Thomas stops breathing.  There's no way.  He can't possibly mean that-

  
There, across tanned skin, the words are cradled by the jut of bone and wrap seductively towards Hamilton's ass.

  
"Life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness; w"

  
That's all that he can see clearly, but that's nearly too much to comprehend already.  A small broken sound escapes him, and he quite dazedly falls a step forwards.  His center of gravity has changed, the point that holds him to the world standing several feet down the hall.

  
He said those words, the day he first arrived back from France.  They were the first thing he said to Alexander; the first in a volley of arguments lasting all day that somehow ended with Hamilton winning and Jefferson reluctantly impressed by the man's fire.

  
Hamilton is so many feet away.  The distance is more than he can stand, now that he knows.

  
"Hamil-Alexan-" The broken noise escapes again, loud and embarrassing.  He's suddenly the one shaking, sobbing, and then Burr, bless him, pushes Alexander in his direction.  The meet in the middle, and Thomas can barely breathe, but he does.  He breathes Alexander in, because it's him.  It's been him the whole time, and Thomas may never let go again.


	4. Chapter 4

"So," Hamilton says, voice watery, clinging like a (hah!) burr.  "I know that you hate me, and I have shit timing, but I've kind of been in love with you forever.  Well, not, like, for the first month I knew you.  Mostly I just thought you were a dick, then.  Since the first company dance, though.  I nearly kissed you when we danced, you know.  I was surprised by how much of a wall flower you were, I couldn't help but ask you to.  I'd have shown you that night, but then you... Well, it was clear you already hated me by then.  I wasn't going to chain you to me, and curse you to a miserable life with a poor, bastard, orphan, immigrant, whore's son-"

Jefferson's grip tightens on Hamilton's hip, and he breathes out through his nose.

  
"I'm sorry.  I shouldn't have said that about your mother.  I was just... Trying to convince myself that I hated you.  Trying to remind myself that I couldn't just kiss you out of nowhere, sweep you off your feet and whisk you away from your wife.  You looked beautiful, and thinking that felt like... it made me feel like I was betraying my soulmate." 

Jefferson gives a stale laugh.  "Guess we we both owe Burr an apology.  Talking less and smiling more might have helped us, that night."

  
"I guess I'll have to tell Burr I don't need him to fuck me over your desk, after all."  It's meant to be a tease, but Thomas actually GROWLS, digging his nails viciously into Hamilton's hips.

  
"ALEXANDER," he warns, and feels the smaller man shiver and twitch beneath his grip.

  
"Sorry," Hamilton breathes quietly, and the words _'kink negotiation'_ float back to the top of Jefferson's mind.

  
"Later," Thomas assures, " ** _I_** will fuck you over my desk until you can't remember your own name.  For now, let's lock up the office."  Thomas doesn't move his hand from Alexander's hip, stroking his thumb absently across the word ' _HAPPINESS_ ,' and Hamilton mostly just follows after him in an adorable daze as he cuts lights and locks doors.

  
"I want to get home and cleaned up," Alexander lets out a little whine when Jefferson says that, and Thomas soothes, "You're coming with me.  I want to memorize what my sentence looks like across your skin, and I'm sure you'd like to do the same for me.  I'm going to finally, FINALLY kiss that mouth of yours.  If you think you're going back to your apartment tonight, you've lost your **_g_ _odamned mind_**.  We're going to get registered as soulmates to push your pending divorce through.  Let Eliza's lawyer take you for the lion's share of y'alls combined assets, the woman deserves it."  Thomas loses his battle with his impulse control, and before they climb into his car (Who own's a car in New York?) Jefferson runs a hand through Hamilton's hair, knocking the ponytail loose.  He lets it stay on the ground of the parking garage, because the little piece of rubber deserves such a fate for pinning Alexander's hair out of sight.

  
"I come from old money; you'll never want again, lovely."  Jefferson hates how hungry Hamilton always looks; hates that he grew up suffering.  He can't help but to clarify immediately that once the filing for their match is done Hamilton will be taken care of.

  
Alexander blushes a delightful pink, and Thomas is surprised his pride isn't rearing it's head yet.  He doesn't doubt it will, but at least for today the beast is tame, and Hamilton won't fight his coddling.

  
Stepping away from Hamilton to circle the car and climb into the driver's seat is awful, and it puts new perspective on all the days he felt miserable leaving work.  They both used to compete to see who could stay latest, and it seems less silly now, considering that's the only place they really see each other.  WAS the only place they got to see each other.  Thomas buckles as quickly as he can and immediately tangles their fingers together.

  
"I won't stop arguing with you, you know.  I'm not going to give up my career to be your pretty little trophy husband."

  
"You think that I want that?" Thomas is incredulous.

  
Hamilton doesn't say anything, and Jefferson suspects that this won't be the last silence to hurt him, nor the last time his previous spite towards Alexander will make things difficult.


	5. Chapter 5

****"...I hate the declaration I wrote."

  
" ** _What_**?" Hamilton's shock is only fractionally a reaction to how left field it is; most of his surprise stems from the statement itself.

  
"I despise it, and not just because the thing made you so fucking difficult to find.  Washington once said that I let my ideals blind me to reality.  That... might not be entirely untrue.  Arguing with you, it provides a perspective that I'd never think of on my own."

  
"Because you're so damned privileged," Hamilton grumbles, and Thomas doesn't argue.

  
"The point is, you ground me, and I think that, in our own twisted way, we make a great team.  The company is better with you there."

  
Hamilton lights up, a smile blooming like Jefferson's words are the purest sunlight, and Thomas can't help but knock him down a little.

  
"Don't go getting a big head, though.  You still talk too damned much."


	6. Chapter 6

Something occurs to him.

  
"Hamilton?"

  
"You can call me Alexander."

  
"Right.  Alexander, then."

  
"Yea?"

  
"The vote-"

  
"I didn't."

  
"What?"

  
"You were going to ask if I voted for you because you're my soulmate.  I didn't."

  
Thomas is skeptical, after their history of disagreements.

  
"Why'd you do it then?"

  
"Look, we've fought on like seventy-five different fronts, but at least you  _have_ beliefs.  Burr..."

  
At hearing the other man's name, even the formal address, jealousy reasserts itself.

  
"I know what you mean," he cuts off before Hamilton can say something.

  
"Don't talk about him when you're with me."

  
Alexander's eyes widen.

  
"You're jealous!"

  
"I'm not."

  
"You _are_!  That's what your attitude lately has been about!  I KNEW you were being worse than normal!"

  
"Well, can you really blame me?  You get around, Alexander!  Sometimes I think I'm the only one in that office who's never kissed you!"

  
"That's preposterous.  You can't be..." Hamilton pauses for a moment.

  
"I nearly tore that kissing booth at the Halloween party apart."

  
"Well damn," Alexander says to himself, then is suddenly examining him with laser focus.

  
"Wait, at Washington's celebration dance, you said that you felt bad about thinking I was beautiful; does that mean-?"

  
"I don't date.  I've had hookups, but," Thomas swallows, "I've never kissed anyone.  I've never fallen in love.  I tried not to fall for you, but I couldn't seem to help myself."

  
"That sounds so lonely...  You wanted your soulmate to be your first love?"

  
"I want you to be my  _only_ love, Alexander."


	7. Chapter 7

Hamilton blushes again, and the faces of all his past romances flash across his mind.

  
"Stop that!" Thomas snaps.

  
"Stop what?"

  
"Stop kicking yourself for the life you've lived.  I don't mind your choices Alexander.  There's nothing about who you are, not even the parts I hate, that makes me love you any less."

  
"You had to see Eliza and I renew our vows last year," Hamilton says, sounding horrified.

  
"That... Wasn't my happiest moment, but I didn't know then that you were... I had only just admitted to myself that I loved you.  I thought for sure that you knew, that you invited me to taunt me.  I couldn't think of another reason that you would want me there."

  
"I wanted to see you dressed up," Alexander admits.  "You wore that godammed purple suit from your first day at the office, and I spent the entire ordeal wondering if there was a reason you wore the outfit from the day we first met.  I was hoping you'd interrupt the ceremony, demand to know what I thought I was doing.  I felt horrible for it."

  
"Well, at least we were both miserable."

  
Hamilton laughs.

  
"God, there were so many times that one of us could have said something, and neither of us did."

  
"I'm just grateful that we're here now."  Jefferson says it just as he pulls into his driveway, and after he's got his door open Alexander is scrambling awkwardly across him to exit out the driver's side door, stubbornly keeping a hold on his hand.

  
"I wasn't doing that again," he insists, referring petulantly to when they had gotten into the vehicle and had to separate for that short duration of time.  Thomas smiles and runs his free hand through Alexander's hair again.

  
"Just so you know, I'm not letting you out of my sight for the rest of our lives, Alexander."

  
"That's the best future I could hope for," Alex says, and both of them are done with dishonesty.


End file.
